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I Tried Perfectionism On For Size. It Didn’t Fit.

The last couple of months has been crazy-cray-cray. Life has changed speed; my confidence has soared and I’ve learnt so much about myself. I’m also not quite as active as I used to be (I can thank starting up an online business for that), though it’s something I’m working on. Baby steps. Yoga in the bedroom, little walks to the shops, random sunshine sessions. The small stuff. Incremental doses.

I’m actively taking stock of all this change; watching my life transition from one to another, and it’s infinitely fascinating.

But here’s one thing I found I have to be careful of (and it’s a hot tip for you): I do not have to follow trend. Yep. I can be selective about systems I implement and how often I send out my newsletter and how it is I’d like to correspond with my clients. Sure, no worries. But I caught myself getting sucked down the funnel of perfectionism.

I’ve always considered myself a free-styling, roll with the punches, wingin’ it type of girl. I’ve been fortunate in that, so far, it’s worked for me. Don’t get me wrong; structure is sexy and systems equal sanity, but generally my life outfit is worn kinda baggy, maybe with some colour and lace. Maybe. If I feel like it.

As any blogger or online entrepreneur will tell you- behind the blog, the wheels are turning and coal is continually being thrown in the engine. Behind the scenes, baby. Behind.The.Scenes. It never stops. Preparing for launches, editorial calendars, writing eBooks (yay! Almost finished!), networking- all that amazing, challenging, soul work. And I love it, but this is what I heard myself say to a friend of mine on the phone a few weeks ago.

Um. Hold up. Whaaaaaaat?!

Where the bloody hell did I pull that from? Since when?

I’m the girl that doesn’t put things back in their right place, and then I wonder why I can never find anything.

I’m the girl who isn’t chained to my to-do list. I can walk away from it just easily as I can bound toward it.

I’m the girl who often gets blue things and purple things and red things on my white top- and then proceed to continue wearing it all day rather than getting it in the soak.

I wash my hair once a week. Got a few little dreadlocks in there at the moment actually. Must be that time.

I’m the girl who doesn’t need the perfect accessory. A nice chunk of amethyst around my neck will do me just fine.

I’m the girl that doesn’t make her bed every morning. Guilty as charged. Some mornings, yes. Every morning? Absolutely not.

But alas! When my own words echoed around my brain it’s as though my whole solar plexus clammed up with hurt. No we’re not. Please tell me we’re not. I like the way we are. I don’t want us to be perfectionists. (Our solar plexus, just beneath our chest, is where we store our personal power, it’s also where we store the promises that we make to ourselves, and our self-betrayals. Me declaring my false perfectionism stung my 3rd chakra, big time.)

So babes. Let’s take a moment to recognise where we’re walking someone else’s talk. And perhaps while we’re at it, I can give you permission (if ever you needed it) to change direction and steer back on-course.

  • You do not have to blog X amount of times per week.
  • You do not need to get everything professionally designed (particularly if you can’t afford it).
  • You do not need to spend 8 hours on a blog post. This one’s taken me 20 minutes, and here’s hoping it’s decent.
  • You are allowed to do it your way. Implement foundations, yes, utilise systems that work, yes, but lose your soul in creating work that isn’t aligned with your passions and energy levels? No way! Sounds bloody horrible.
  • You are allowed to be fantastic. You are allowed to cuss on your blog.
  • You are allowed to enjoy your business, blog and life without getting sucked into the franticness of it all. Some people run better on frantic energy, they’re wired that way. Me? Hells no. And when I do, I find myself declaring a Day Of Healing very, very quickly (highly effective, by the way!).

Please do it your way. That’s why we love you. And credit where credit’s due, that why women love it here, at Such Different Skies, because apart from a brief little stint of wanna-be-perfectionism, I’m rocking out blissfully, my way.

Speaking of rocking out authentically, I need to offer you a heart-felt thank you all the beautiful feedback in response to my last post- where I explained why I’ve disabled comments on my blog. So much appreciation. Thank you loves.

Okay- you know what to do- share this bad ass around on your social media. Spread the ‘I’m-gonna-do-it-my-way!’ love. Catch you all on Saturday for a another video and a giveaway (yippee!).

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. Introducing! 5 Steps to Killer Confidence: Your Tool Kit for Living a Confident, Inspired Life. My Gift to You. - Such Different Skies - October 19, 2012

    [...] I posted on my short-lived encounter with perfectionism, and designing this e-book serendipitously reminded me to start from where I am. I’m the type [...]

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